Welcome 2014!

2013 was a rough year. I struggled with depression for pretty much the entire year. There were many times when I thought it would never get better and I would spend my life in a fog of sadness, guilt, and melancholy.

Sometime in December, I finally felt the fog lift. I am hesitant to believe it will last, but I'm grateful for the weight that is off my chest, allowing me to enjoy life.

I am hopeful that 2014 will be better. I know there will be struggles. Between Dad's two types of cancer and Mom's Alzheimer's diagnosis, I'm going to be busy taking care of them. While I'm caring for them, I'm going to try to remember to be grateful for the opportunity to have them close.

It was hard for me to take care of myself this year. Hell, it was hard for me to take a shower sometimes. I want to do a better job of that in 2014. My body needs better nutrition, much more activity, and attempts at serenity. In order to reach that goal, I'm going to try yoga. I don't know if I'll stick with it (I won't feel bad about it if I don't) but I'm at least going to give it a try.

I haven't met my reading goals for the last two years. It's been hard for me to sit and enjoy a book. I'm going to try to get back on track in the new year. I love to read and can't wait to have that piece of happiness back. I have stacks of books just waiting for me to open them up and get lost in them.

Of course, there are the kitties. Not just mine, but the ones at Wayside Waifs. I hope to give them all the love they need.

I wish for all of my friends and family a happy, healthy, and enjoyable new year.

My Christmas Wish

I've always loved Christmas. All the sparkle and lights make me giddy. I've been looking forward to having our first Christmas in our new home since we first found it. I was planning on where to put our tree before the other owner's furniture was even gone.

Now that's it's here, I'm not as joyful as I had hoped. I'm trying, though. I'm grasping at every little bit of holiday cheer that I can.

I have a lot to look forward to in the next month. First, a friend is coming to visit for a long weekend. The next weekend, my nephew and his family will be here to celebrate Christmas. Then, on Christmas Eve, my niece and her family are coming and will spend the night with us.

My wish for the season is that I'm able to be in the moment for all of these events. They will be so full of fun and love; I don't want to miss out on that. I feel like I'm missing out on so much by spending so much time and effort fighting depression. I miss life.

That's all I want for Christmas.