Monday, August 17, 2009

What Would They Find?

I was sitting on the couch yesterday, surveying my apartment. I got to thinking about what would happen if I died. What would my family find in my home? Would anything embarrass me? Well, let's just see.

Kitchen: There's an excessive amount of beer for one person. That's because I don't drink very often, but keep buying different kinds. The trash is pretty full and by the time someone found me, would probably be kind of stinky. There might be a dirty glass beside the sink, but the dish drainer will be FULL of dishes I've left to air dry. The fridge is a disaster. There's no organization whatsoever. Breakfast bar has a naked Chia Pet, fish tank, bowl of hard candy, bouquet of flowers, handcuffs and extra magazine case laying on it.

Living/Dining Room: Sunday paper laying on the sofa with cut-out coupons laying in various piles waiting to be filed. Stack of wedding magazines and my wedding notebook on the chaise. Can of wasp spray on the floor next to the patio door. Dining room table is very cluttered, I don't eat there, it's just a catch-all. Dottie's bag of hay, desk calendar, some mail, paint chips, pictures of wedding dresses and on it goes. VHS tapes stacked up on the floor because I haven't found a place to put them yet. Stereo and speakers disconnected and on floor because they don't fit in new entertainment cabinet. Three plastic totes full of stuff I haven't unpacked from the move. Empty cooler under the table because I have no where else to store it.

Guest Bathroom: Very clean (it's rarely used) but clothes hanging from every possible spot, waiting to be ironed. Door knob, towel rack, shower curtain rod all covered in clothes.

Hallway: More unironed clothed hanging from the doorknob of the utility closet.

Office: Stuff everywhere. Stacks of papers from an investigation currently being condcuted. Blank inspection forms. Stack of papers from a case I haven't filed yet. Notes on scraps of paper on both desks. Half-full bottle of water. Two pillows and comforter on the futon from the last time I had guests. Gun and badge laying on display shelf of work desk. Bottom drawer of file cabinet open about an inch. More unironed clothes hanging from doorknob.

Bedroom: Not too bad. Bed isn't made. Empty lemonade can on nightstand is about the worst part of the room. Dresser has jewelry, lip balm and eye drops. It's lived-in, but not messy.

Master Bathroom: You guessed it. More unironed clothes. Again hanging from the shower curtain rod and also on the hook on the back of the door. Makeup, two cosmetics bags, comb, ponytail holder, two hairclips, headband and new bottle of body wash all on the counter. Floor is undoubtedly covered in hair-I tend to lose a lot of hair! Trash can full of tissues and contact lens packaging.

All in all, I guess it's not that bad. If my family had to clean my apartment out, they wouldn't find anything shocking. But let's hope that never has to happen!