I had a meeting yesterday with my two partners and a couple of local law enforcement officers. It was just a regular day. Much better than the day before.
After the meeting, we were standing around talking about a recent law enforcement suicide. Although the suicide was not a result of depression, but of a triggering event (as is typical with law enforcement suicide) it brought up the topic of depression and mental illness.
In a nonchalant, matter of fact way, I said, "I deal with depression, blah, blah, blah." It was no big deal. I said it just like it was nothing to be ashamed of...to a couple of cops!
I can't tell you how good it felt to just say it. I'm not trying to hide it, I'm not trying to make an issue out of it, it's just a fact of my everyday life. Some people have migraines, some have depression. I fall into the depression category.
I feel like it was a huge step for me. I've come to accept depression as a part of my life. I'm fighting it out in the open now.
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Way to go! And I totally second the No Big Deal part. And I'm not one bit surprised you had the courage to do it. Nonchalantly, too. You're one amazing person.
ReplyDeleteGood for you girl. It is nothing to be embarrassed about. The most important thing is to recognize and admit you have it and then try to work with it by possibly drugs, counseling, etc. I have had short-term depression, and it's no fun. Long-term depression can be a big challenge and must be met head-on. Can't tell you how proud of you I am. You even work in a job that is male oriented and one where the public opinion is of one tough guy or cookie. In other words, it really took courage to admit that in front of your peers. Hugs dear friend.
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